The beauty and brutality of EJ Obiena’s world

The beauty: He’s holding a pole vault meet in Manila with star athletes on September 20 and he’s raised enough money for a local pole vault facility. The brutality: LA2028 is still up in the air, a spine injury, and the loneliness of life in training. 

Images of a distraught EJ Obiena after the pole vault final at the Paris Olympics where he missed the podium by a hairline seared into our collective memory. In a rare moment, we as a nation shared in the grief of one man who has sacrificed so much to represent our country. EJ’s heart is broken. So is ours.  

So when I attended his virtual press conference yesterday, August 7, a day after that fateful Parisian summer evening, I wasn’t completely surprised that a somber-looking EJ greeted us through his computer screen thousands of miles away in Formia, Italy, where has been living and training for most of the past few years. 

His adviser, mentor, and “really good friend” James Michael Lafferty broke the ice and also broke the news that we didn’t want to hear but also sort-of expected after EJ’s cryptic post a week before the Olympics opened.

Images of a distraught EJ Obiena after the pole vault final at the Paris Olympics where he missed the podium by a hairline seared into our collective memory. EJ is heartbroken. So are we. Photos from AP; banner photo from AFP  

News sites have already written about EJ’s spine injury, and what makes him an exceptional athlete. I’m here to talk about what struck me the most about the 28-year-old elite athlete during the hour-long presscon. I have long admired EJ for his courage, his integrity amid corruption, and his unflinching patriotism for a country that at times is so difficult to love—more than his incredible athleticism and sportsmanship.   

The presscon only made me further admire this young man who is more than just an exceptional athlete, but most importantly an exceptional human being. There’s so much we can learn from him about life and how we can embrace the beauty—and brutality—of it all. 

A brutal sport

Over the course of the 63-minute-long presser, EJ dropped the words “beauty” and “brutality” in one breath on more than one occasion. I think these contrasting words perfectly sum up his journey as an athlete so far, a recurring theme among people like him who get to bask in the glory of winning but also despair in the face of defeat. 

“For now I think I’m still processing a lot of it,” the world No. 2 pole vaulter said. “As days pass, I think I understand more and more but what I feel and how I think I’m going to move forward, I’ll take it one day at a time.” 

“(Pole vaulting) is a sport. It can be beautiful and brutal at the same time,” he added. 

“I can promise you guys that I did everything that I can (given) all the circumstances I dealt with. I’m definitely proud of what I’ve achieved, but like I said, it doesn’t really lessen the disappointment and pain of coming in fourth.” This is one thing I observed about EJ in all his previous interviews, he acknowledges his achievements—and is proud of them as he should be—but is brutally frank about his real feelings. 

“(Pole vaulting) is a sport. It can be beautiful and brutal at the same time,” he added. 

A somber-looking EJ Obiena greeted media in yesterday’s press conference. He was joined by his adviser, mentor, and good friend James Michael Lafferty.

EJ didn’t expect this year to be, if I may use the word, brutal. “But you know sports. You’ll never know. When you push yourself, when you push your body to the limits, things happen. Unfortunately this year has been rough.” However, he doesn’t want to use that as an excuse, saying that he believes he is fully capable of winning. “That’s what makes it painful is that I was that close,” he admitted. 

That’s another thing about EJ: he doesn’t make excuses. His friend Lafferty, whom he has known for almost a decade, could attest to this. “I can’t even state how proud I am of this guy and proud to know him, proud to work with him, proud to be a part of his team. The toughness, the unwillingness to make excuses, I think everybody should be so proud of him. That’s the real story,” said Lafferty. 

I need to face the reality that we’re not Americans, I don’t have five sets of poles. Those things aren’t cheap. It’s part of the journey. It’s part of being an athlete. It’s part of being a Filipino athlete.”

EJ also encountered some problems transporting his poles, which is another brutal side to a sport that requires you to lug around poles as long as 10 to 17 feet. But because he’s EJ, he doesn’t make excuses. 

“It definitely didn’t help that I snapped some poles but it’s not an excuse. It’s part of the sport, the trouble of transporting poles and all these things,” he explained. “I need to face the reality that we’re not Americans, I don’t have five sets of poles. Those things aren’t cheap. It’s part of the journey. It’s part of being an athlete. It’s part of being a Filipino athlete.

After listening to EJ and Lafferty, the most brutal part of EJ’s journey indeed is the process leading to each competition. Pole vaulting, as EJ explained, is a complex sport. “It takes a lot of years perfecting the movement and believing in having that consistency and trusting yourself,” he said.

To succeed in such a competitive sport, EJ in many ways has to be “brutal” to himself, he has to, as Lafferty puts it, pay the price. And what is the price? 

EJ Obiena on pole vaulting: “It’s not a balanced life. It’s not the most ideal. This life of ours, like what I said, can be beautiful and brutal.” Photo above from AP; below from Reuters

“(In Italy) He lives alone. He trains eight hours a day, then goes home, same routine every day. No family, no support, he cooks his own meals,” shared Lafferty. “Never having a beer with his friends, a coke, a bag of French fries, halo-halo, or white rice—for years.” 

Lafferty says EJ lives a life of “total discipline,” so disciplined EJ is that he felt bad after having a cheeseburger after the Olympic final.

“He never misses training. Never cheats. He’s breathtakingly disciplined. I think he’s just in another league,” added the American businessman and honorary coach and consultant for the Philippine Amateur Track and Field Association. 

Another thing I observed about EJ is that he is brutally honest. He wouldn’t give you an answer you want to hear, but a candid one even if it’s not what you want to get out of him.

That’s why when asked if he would recommend young people to take up pole vaulting, EJ said he cannot say in “good conscience” that it’s something that one should do, that it’s the path to success. “It’s not something that you should just half-heartedly decide on. This is something that would take a lot from you more than you’d think,” he explained. “You need to be committed. You need to fully understand the facts of it. It’s not like I stay in Baguio and it’s a five-hour bus ride going back to Manila. This requires full dedication. You need to do what needs to be done.”

But EJ says that if you’re really sure that you want to get into pole vaulting then who is he to tell you to not do it. “I won’t tell you to not do it because it’s hard. You should do it because it’s hard.”

“It’s not a balanced life. It’s not the most ideal. This life of ours, like what I said, can be beautiful and brutal.” 

Beautiful things to look forward to

Despite the anguish of the past few days, there’s so much beauty to be found in EJ’s Paris Olympics story, largely because of how he himself chooses to move forward. He says he wants to take it one day at a time and that he’ll focus on being healthy again.

“My goal right now is hopefully to hold my world ranking,” he said, adding that he still doesn’t know exactly what lies ahead, except for a few competitions lined up this season. “We’ll deliberate, regroup, and try to understand the possibilities.”

The LA 2028 question inevitably came up. To which EJ gave a candid response as expected: “If I don’t fully comprehend the sacrifices I need to do—I don’t want to be in LA just to be in LA. If I’m going to do that I’m going all out and win that thing. 

I can promise you guys that I did everything that I can (given) all the circumstances I dealt with. I’m definitely proud of what I’ve achieved, but like I said, it doesn’t really lessen the disappointment and pain of coming in fourth.”

“If I were to do that, I need to be able to look my parents in the eye (when I say) that I’m not going to see them in the next four years at least. They need to understand that it’s going to be another four painstaking years that I need to live like this.”

EJ pleaded for time to process everything first. “I hope you guys understand. It’s not an easy decision to make. Hopefully I will be able to fully commit and say with all my being I’m going be there and represent the Philippines to the best of my ability. If not then not at all.” 

“That’s not how I do things. I don’t go out there and say, ‘I’m just going to be there,” he added emphatically.

And EJ being EJ, he saw the beauty in the brutality of such a heart-shattering loss. “The first guy who came to me was Emmanouil. I’ve known him since 2019. We’ve trained together. It’s a good dynamic that we have,” he shared. But then again, EJ is not one for sugarcoating, so he added: “I’m happy for him but at the same time it sucks.”

“I wanted to be the first one to congratulate him. There’s a brutal side to it, coming in fourth with the same height. The beauty of it is seeing someone get their first medal. It’s a weird feeling inside,” he continued.

EJ is also happy for silver medalist Sam Kendricks of the US, whom he said had his best Olympics finish this year. “And Mondo (Duplantis) doing Mondo things. What can I say? I just wish he’s happy and having fun, which I think he is.”

On his own Olympics story, EJ believes that despite the outcome being not what he wanted, he was able to solidify his standing as one of the best pole vaulters in the world, all things considered. Photo above from AFP; the one below from EJ Obiena’s Instagram

He also acknowledged fellow Filipino athlete Carlos Yulo and the gymnast’s historic back-to-back gold medal wins. “I think it’s not going to be the last Olympics where we’ll win gold. I think it’s just going to be better from here on.”

On his own Olympics story, EJ believes that despite the outcome being not what he wanted, he was able to solidify his standing as one of the best pole vaulters in the world, all things considered. 

Another beautiful thing to look forward to is the world-class pole vault meet he’s organizing for the Philippines. He shared that the event has already been registered with the World Athletics and will be held on September 20 at the Ayala Triangle Gardens. He shared that the tournament will be using outdoor surfaces that will comply with global standards. 

Some of those who might see action are Karalis, as well as Huang Bokai of China, who also trains under Obiena’s coach Vitaly Petrov. Obiena is also looking to invite the likes of Duplantis and Oleg Zernikel of Germany.

I just played my heart out. I’m very blessed to have the opportunity to represent such a nation, such a country that raised me, that taught me the values I needed to be a great pole vaulter. Enduring, patient, resilient, we are people who make things happen. I think that’s what our culture is.”

EJ is also finally able to focus on providing opportunities for the next generation of Filipino pole vaulters, something that has taken the back seat because he was too focused on preparing for the Olympics. 

“I know we have raised enough funds and now we’re trying to look for a place where we’re going to donate a pit and some vaulting poles to a province somewhere in the Philippines. Pole vaulting definitely has a lack of equipment but not a lack of talent for sure. I want to do that (provide opportunities)—I’ll definitely do that, it’s not even a want anymore.”

And despite the many brutalities he had to endure to get to where he is right now, including his most recent heartbreak, EJ recognizes the “immeasurable” beauty that comes from “the outpouring of positivity that came out of all the disappointment.” If you’re wondering if he has read our messages of love and support, yes he has.  

For all that you’ve done for our country and us Filipinos, maraming salamat, EJ! Padayon!
Photo from AFP

“I just played my heart out. I’m very blessed to have the opportunity to represent such a nation, such a country that raised me, that taught me the values I needed to be a great pole vaulter. Enduring, patient, resilient, we are people who make things happen. I think that’s what our culture is,” he said. 

“I’m very proud to be able to represent all of you. I wish there was a way to materialize that and I wanted that to be an Olympics medal.” 

No worries, EJ. We don’t need a medal. You are more than enough. Thank you for letting us in on your journey—through the beauty and brutality of it all. Thank you for choosing to represent the Philippines even if at times there’s hardly any beauty to be found in the effort at all. 

You are a national treasure. Padayon!

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