In South Korea, a growing feminist movement called 4B, short for bihon (no marriage), bichulsan (no childbirth), biyeonae (no dating), and bisekseu (no heterosexual sex) is gaining traction among young women. The “bi” (비) in each term translates to “no” or “non-” in Korean. On the surface, this movement might seem like a radical rejection of men and relationships, but dig deeper, and it reveals something more profound: a reckoning with societal expectations that have historically tied a woman’s worth to her roles as a wife and mother.
For young Filipinas facing their own pressures to marry and start families, the ideas behind 4B may feel surprisingly familiar. Filipino culture, much like South Korea’s, places a high value on traditional gender roles, relationships, and family obligations. But can Filipinas learn something valuable from this growing movement? We say, yes, absolutely.
Related story: ‘When women lead, the world is better for all people and the planet.’
What is the 4B Movement?
The 4B movement emerged in South Korea during the mid-2010s, fueled by rising frustration among women over rampant sexism, economic inequality, and the suffocating pressures of a patriarchal society. Women had reached a tipping point, rejecting gender-based violence, the massive wage gap, and exhausting beauty standards.
The numbers paint a bleak picture: A study by South Korea’s Ministry of Gender Equality and Family revealed that 41.5% of women experienced intimate-partner violence, far exceeding the global average of 30%. Adding to the study, South Korea has the largest gender wage gap among OECD countries, with women earning 31% less than men. Combine these factors with beauty standards and it’s no surprise that women are pushing back.
At its core, the 4B movement isn’t just about saying no to men, it’s about rejecting the idea that a woman’s life should revolve around meeting societal expectations. Women in the movement are embracing financial independence, self-care, and solidarity with other women, offering a refreshing alternative to traditional norms like marriage, child-rearing, and heteronormative relationships.
Related story: LIST: Meet the 10 richest women in the Philippines
Interestingly, the 4B movement gained traction in the United States, following Trump’s victory, when many American women expressed concerns over potential rollbacks on reproductive rights and gender equality. In this context, some American women found inspiration in the movement, seeing it as a way to assert autonomy in a world that seemed increasingly hostile to their choices.
While it isn’t a full-fledged movement in the US, the rise of the 4B conversation reflected shared frustrations with patriarchal systems across cultures.
How relevant is it for Filipinas?
While 4B is uniquely South Korean, many of the frustrations fueling the movement echo issues faced by Filipinas.
Cultural expectations around marriage and family. In the Philippines, marriage and motherhood are still seen as essential milestones, often reinforced by religious and familial expectations. If you’re a single Filipina over 30, how many times have you been asked, “When are you settling down?”
This mirrors the experiences of South Korean women, who often feel shunned for remaining unmarried. But attitudes are shifting among younger generations. According to the Philippine Statistics Authority, marriage rates in the Philippines have dropped from 2009 to 2020.
Economic pressures are real. Economic realities are also reshaping how young people view relationships. In South Korea, the high cost of living and fierce competition for jobs make starting a family feel like an impossible dream. Similarly, here, underemployment, low wages, and rising housing costs turn marriage and children into financial burdens rather than accomplishments. For many, stepping away from traditional roles is more than a choice, it’s a matter of survival.
Related story: 5 must-read novels by South Korean writers
Building community and solidarity
One of the most inspiring aspects of the 4B movement is how it emphasizes collective action. In South Korea, women have built supportive networks through platforms like KakaoTalk, where they exchange financial advice, map out women-owned businesses, and find solidarity in a society that often scrutinizes their choices.
Filipinas could benefit from adopting a similar approach. Women-centered spaces, both online and offline, could foster solidarity and practical support. Imagine communities that offer everything from financial literacy workshops to wellness retreats and professional mentorship. The possibilities for creating safe, empowering spaces are endless.
Related story: 7 must-read contemporary female Japanese authors
Rethinking beauty standards
The 4B movement also challenges South Korea’s demanding beauty culture. Women in the “escape the corset” sub-movement have embraced a minimalist approach to beauty, ditching makeup, and traditional clothing norms. A 2019 survey by the Korea Women’s Development Institute revealed that 24% of women in their 20s had reduced their spending on beauty products.
Filipinas face similar pressures to conform to beauty ideals, with light skin and slim figures often seen as the gold standard. But movements promoting body positivity and natural beauty are gaining momentum.
What can Filipinas take away from 4B?
While the 4B movement may not take off in the Philippines where family ties and social harmony hold deep cultural significance, the underlying principles of autonomy and solidarity, have the potential to resonate widely.
Autonomy is key. Financial independence, personal success, or simply reclaiming your time, every woman deserves to live on her own terms.
Support systems matter. Building connections through friendships, professional networks, or online groups can make breaking away from societal norms less daunting.
It’s okay to say no. Say no to relationships that don’t serve you, to beauty standards that drain you, and to societal pressures that don’t align with your goals.
Related story: The single girl’s guide to starting her jewelry collection
Choosing your own path
A lot of young women are challenging traditional narratives. While the paths they take may differ, the goal remains the same: a life defined by their own choices.
Whether you’re single and thriving, married and redefining what that means, or simply figuring it all out as you go, one thing is certain: your life is yours to design. And perhaps that’s the most radical act of all.
